PRIDE

Claire Preston

Welcome. Here we have a beautiful, detached family home on the outskirts of Oxford set in five acres of land with stables, unfortunately no livestock. You will find the house in the condition in which the previous occupants last lived. They departed twelve weeks ago. All fixtures and fittings are included.
            Entering, we have an expansive hallway where a crystal chandelier once hung. It was missing on their last dinner party. Apparently, it had been sent off for repairs. To the left is the lounge which has an interconnecting dining room. The kitchen straight ahead was extended three years ago. The chefs they hired said the equipment was of elite standard. No expense spared. By the way, do not touch any of the powder residue or drinking glasses on the worktops.
            Through the door to the right, you will find the unfinished cinema room and swimming pool. Work ceased about a year ago.
            Upstairs we have three generously large bedrooms. The smallest room was his personal office. It looks like he brought his work home. Sloppy admin: unopened letters stamped urgent, the scattered papers, he must have been looking for something. Obviously loved whiskey, anyone for spin the bottle? Only joking. In the corner was his pride and joy, his military collection. One or two pieces still work. Recently tested.
            Next, the princess room as the plaque obviously states. Very pink, lots of stuffed toys, oh and her antique rocking horse. She loved her real horse, at least they are still together. Anyway, look at the drawings on her desk, aren’t they pretty? She was a very good for a five-year-old. The walk-in wardrobe is a room in itself. Let’s ignore the artwork in here, everyone else did.
            The master bedroom. The décor is exquisite with gold leaf trellis and navy velour wallpaper. Again, the walk-in wardrobe is vast, although feels sparse. That might be down to his wife’s jewellery collection being incomplete and her attire, all last season.
            You may have noticed a similar theme in both bedrooms, the red splatter effect. Don’t worry about that, it will wash off very easily. You may want to buy some new beds though.
            Now back downstairs to the garage.
            Big enough for three cars and extremely airtight, even exhaust fumes cannot escape.  
            Now, ladies and gentlemen, any offers?